Chapter 4

           

           Ofcourse,I’vehadalotoftimetoformulatemyopinionsaboutdivinitysincethatnightonthebathroomfloorwhenIspoketoGoddirectlyforthefirsttime.InthemiddleofthatdarkNovembercrisis,though,Iwasnotinterestedinformulatingmyviewsontheology.Iwasinterestedonlyinsavingmylife.IhadfinallynoticedthatIseemedtohavereachedastateofhopelessandlife-threateningdespair,anditoccurredtomethatsometimespeopleinthisstatewillapproachGodforhelp.IthinkI’dreadthatinabooksomewhere.

           WhatIsaidtoGodthroughmygaspingsobswassomethinglikethis:"Hello,God.Howareyou?I’mLiz.It’snicetomeetyou."

           That’sright-Iwasspeakingtothecreatoroftheuniverseasthoughwe’djustbeenintroducedatacocktailparty.Butweworkwithwhatweknowinthislife,andthesearethewordsIalwaysuseatthebeginningofarelationship.Infact,itwasallIcoulddotostopmyselffromsaying,"I’vealwaysbeenabigfanofyourwork…"

           "I’msorrytobotheryousolateatnight,"Icontinued."ButI’minserioustrouble.AndI’msorryIhaven’teverspokendirectlytoyoubefore,butIdohopeIhavealwaysexpressedamplegratitudeforalltheblessingsthatyou’vegivenmeinmylife."

           Thisthoughtcausedmetosobevenharder.Godwaitedmeout.Ipulledmyselftogetherenoughtogoon:"Iamnotanexpertatpraying,asyouknow.Butcanyoupleasehelpme?Iamindesperateneedofhelp.Idon’tknowwhattodo.Ineedananswer.Pleasetellmewhattodo.Pleasetellmewhattodo.

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