Ешь, молись, люби

Chapter 8

           Willyoumakemyhusbandgivemeadivorce?WillyoumakeDavidbesexuallyattractedtomeagain?Iwasrightlyashamedofmyselfforthesethoughts:whotravelsallthewayaroundtheworldtomeetanancientmedicinemaninIndonesia,onlytoaskhimtointercedeinboytrouble?

           SowhentheoldmanaskedmeinpersonwhatIreallywanted,Ifoundother,truerwords.

           "IwanttohavealastingexperienceofGod,"Itoldhim."SometimesIfeellikeIunderstandthedivinityofthisworld,butthenIloseitbecauseIgetdistractedbymypettydesiresandfears.IwanttobewithGodallthetime.ButIdon’twanttobeamonk,ortotallygiveupworldlypleasures.IguesswhatIwanttolearnishowtoliveinthisworldandenjoyitsdelights,butalsodevotemyselftoGod."

           Ketutsaidhecouldanswermyquestionwithapicture.Heshowedmeasketchhe’ddrawnonceduringmeditation.Itwasanandrogynoushumanfigure,standingup,handsclaspedinprayer.Butthisfigurehadfourlegs,andnohead.Wheretheheadshouldhavebeen,therewasonlyawildfoliageoffernsandflowers.Therewasasmall,smilingfacedrawnovertheheart.

           "Tofindthebalanceyouwant,"Ketutspokethroughhistranslator,"thisiswhatyoumustbecome.Youmustkeepyourfeetgroundedsofirmlyontheearththatit’slikeyouhavefourlegs,insteadoftwo.Thatway,youcanstayintheworld.Butyoumuststoplookingattheworldthroughyourhead.Youmustlookthroughyourheart,instead.Thatway,youwillknowGod."

           Thenheaskedifhecouldreadmypalm.

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