Ешь, молись, люби

Chapter 58

           IfIwanttransformation,butcan’tevenbebotheredtoarticulatewhat,exactly,I’maimingfor,howwilliteveroccur?Halfthebenefitofprayerisintheaskingitself,intheofferingofaclearlyposedandwell-consideredintention.Ifyoudon’thavethis,allyourpleasanddesiresareboneless,floppy,inert;theyswirlatyourfeetinacoldfogandneverlift.SonowItakethetimeeverymorningtosearchmyselfforspecificityaboutwhatIamtrulyaskingfor.Ikneelthereinthetemplewithmyfaceonthatcoldmarbleforaslongasittakesmetoformulateanauthenticprayer.IfIdon’tfeelsincere,thenIwillstaythereontheflooruntilIdo.Whatworkedyesterdaydoesn’talwaysworktoday.Prayerscanbecomestaleanddroneintotheboringandfamiliarifyouletyourattentionstagnate.Inmakinganefforttostayalert,Iamassumingcustodialresponsibilityforthemaintenanceofmyownsoul.

           Destiny,Ifeel,isalsoarelationship-aplaybetweendivinegraceandwillfulself-effort.Halfofityouhavenocontrolover;halfofitisabsolutelyinyourhands,andyouractionswillshowmeasurableconsequence.Manisneitherentirelyapuppetofthegods,norisheentirelythecaptainofhisowndestiny;he’salittleofboth.Wegallopthroughourliveslikecircusperformersbalancingontwospeedingside-by-sidehorses-onefootisonthehorsecalled"fate,"theotheronthehorsecalled"freewill.

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