Большие ожидания

Chapter 17

           

           Andnow,becausemymindwasnotconfusedenoughbefore,Icomplicateditsconfusionfiftythousand-fold,byhavingstatesandseasonswhenIwasclearthatBiddywasimmeasurablybetterthanEstella,andthattheplainhonestworkinglifetowhichIwasbornhadnothinginittobeashamedof,butofferedmesufficientmeansofself-respectandhappiness.Atthosetimes,IwoulddecideconclusivelythatmydisaffectiontodearoldJoeandtheforgewasgone,andthatIwasgrowingupinafairwaytobepartnerswithJoeandtokeepcompanywithBiddywhenallinamomentsomeconfoundingremembranceoftheHavishamdayswouldfalluponmelikeadestructivemissile,andscattermywitsagain.Scatteredwitstakealongtimepickingup;andoftenbeforeIhadgotthemwelltogether,theywouldbedispersedinalldirectionsbyonestraythought,thatperhapsafterallMissHavishamwasgoingtomakemyfortunewhenmytimewasout.

           Ifmytimehadrunout,itwouldhaveleftmestillattheheightofmyperplexities,Idaresay.Itneverdidrunout,however,butwasbroughttoaprematureend,asIproceedtorelate.

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