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Chapter 12. In which a Great Patriotic Conference is holden

           Whenhalf-a-dozenofyoufalloutbytheears,itseemsthatmotherearthcangivebirthtonootherrulers.Doesyourqualificationlieinthesuperiorknowledgeofmenwhichaccepts,courts,andpuffsthisman?Or,ifyouarecompetenttojudgearightthesignsIneverfailtoshowyouwhenheappearsamongyou,isyoursuperiorhonestyyourqualification?’Tworatheruglyquestionsthese,alwaysgoingabouttownwithMrMerdle;andtherewasatacitagreementthattheymustbestifled.

           InMrsMerdle’sabsenceabroad,MrMerdlestillkeptthegreathouseopenforthepassagethroughitofastreamOfvisitors.Afewofthesetookaffablepossessionoftheestablishment.Threeorfourladiesofdistinctionandlivelinessusedtosaytooneanother,‘LetusdineatourdearMerdle’snextThursday.Whomshallwehave?’OurdearMerdlewouldthenreceivehisinstructions;andwouldsitheavilyamongthecompanyattableandwanderlumpishlyabouthisdrawing-roomsafterwards,onlyremarkableforappearingtohavenothingtodowiththeentertainmentbeyondbeinginitsway.

           TheChiefButler,theAvengingSpiritofthisgreatman’slife,relaxednothingofhisseverity.Helookedonatthesedinnerswhenthebosomwasnotthere,ashelookedonatotherdinnerswhenthebosomwasthere;andhiseyewasabasilisktoMrMerdle.Hewasahardman,andwouldneverbateanounceofplateorabottleofwine.Hewouldnotallowadinnertobegiven,unlessitwasuptohismark.Hesetforththetableforhisowndignity.

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