Лорд Джим

Chapter 36

           Youmustadmitthatitisromanticbeyondthewildestdreamsofhisboyhood,andyetthereistomymindasortofprofoundandterrifyinglogicinit,asifitwereourimaginationalonethatcouldsetlooseuponusthemightofanoverwhelmingdestiny.Theimprudenceofourthoughtsrecoilsuponourheads;whotoyswiththeswordshallperishbythesword.Thisastoundingadventure,ofwhichthemostastoundingpartisthatitistrue,comesonasanunavoidableconsequence.Somethingofthesorthadtohappen.Yourepeatthistoyourselfwhileyoumarvelthatsuchathingcouldhappenintheyearofgracebeforelast.Butithashappenedandthereisnodisputingitslogic.

           ‘IputitdownhereforyouasthoughIhadbeenaneyewitness.Myinformationwasfragmentary,butI’vefittedthepiecestogether,andthereisenoughofthemtomakeanintelligiblepicture.Iwonderhowhewouldhaverelatedithimself.Hehasconfidedsomuchinmethatattimesitseemsasthoughhemustcomeinpresentlyandtellthestoryinhisownwords,inhiscarelessyetfeelingvoice,withhisoffhandmanner,alittlepuzzled,alittlebothered,alittlehurt,butnowandthenbyawordoraphrasegivingoneoftheseglimpsesofhisveryownselfthatwereneveranygoodforpurposesoforientation.It’sdifficulttobelievehewillnevercome.Ishallneverhearhisvoiceagain,norshallIseehissmoothtan-and-pinkfacewithawhitelineontheforehead,andtheyouthfuleyesdarkenedbyexcitementtoaprofound,unfathomableblue.’

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