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Chapter 43

           ThenlatersheheardPilar’sbigvoicefromawaybelowonthehillsideshoutingupsomeobscenitytoherthatshecouldnotunderstandandshethought,Oh,Godno,no.Don’ttalklikethatwithhiminperil.Don’toffendanyoneandmakeuselessrisks.Don’tgiveanyprovocation.

           ThenshecommencedtoprayforRobertoquicklyandautomaticallyasshehaddoneatschool,sayingtheprayersasfastasshecouldandcountingthemonthefingersofherlefthand,prayingbytensofeachofthetwoprayersshewasrepeating.Thenthebridgeblewandonehorsesnappedhishalterwhenheroseandjerkedhisheadatthecrackingroarandhewentoffthroughthetrees.Mariacaughthimfinallyandbroughthimback,shivering,trembling,hischestdarkwithsweat,thesaddledown,andcomingbackthroughthetreessheheardshootingbelowandshethoughtIcannotstandthislonger.Icannotlivenotknowinganylonger.Icannotbreatheandmymouthissodry.AndIamafraidandIamnogoodandIfrightenthehorsesandonlycaughtthishorsebyhazardbecauseheknockedthesaddledownagainstatreeandcaughthimselfkickingintothestirrupsandnowasIgetthesaddleup,Oh,God,Idonotknow.Icannotbearit.Ohpleasehavehimbeallrightforallmyheartandallofmeisatthebridge.TheRepublicisonethingandwemustwinisanotherthing.But,Oh,SweetBlessedVirgin,bringhimbacktomefromthebridgeandIwilldoanythingthousayestever.BecauseIamnothere.Thereisn’tanyme.Iamonlywithhim.

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