Волхв

Chapter 66

           Wewereallthesame;Isaidhardlyanything,butthatmademenomoreinnocentorlessconditioned.ThesolemnfiguresoftheOldCountry,theQueen,thePublicSchool,Oxbridge,theRightAccent,PeopleLikeUs,stoodaroundthetablelikesecretpolice,readytocrushdowninaninstantonanyattemptatanintelligentEuropeanhumanity.Itwassymptomaticthattheubiquitouspersonofspeechwas"one"itwasone’sview,one’sfriends,one’sservants,one’sfavoritewriter,one’stravelinginGreece,untiltheterriblefacelessAvengingGodoftheBritish,One,wasstandinglikeasoot-blackenedobeliskoverthewholeevening.Iwalkedbacktothehotelwiththecritic,thinking,inakindofagonizedpanic,ofthelight-filledsolitudesofPhraxos;ofthelossesIhadsuffered."Dreadfulbores,theseCouncilpeople,"hesaid."Butonehastolive."Hedidn’tcomein.HesaidhewouldstrolluptotheAcropolis.ButhestrolledtowardsZappeion,aparkwherethemoredesperateofthestarvingvillageboyswhoflocktoAthensselltheirthinbodiesforthepriceofameal.IwenttoZonar’sinPanepistemiouandsatatthebarandhadalargebrandy.Ifeltupset,profoundlyunabletofacethereturntoEngland.Iwasinexile,andforever,whetherIlivedthereornot.ThefactofexileIcouldstand;butthelonelinessofexilewasintolerable.Itwasabouthalf-pasttwelvewhenIgotbacktomyroom.TherewastheusualhotairlessnessofnocturnalAthensinsummer.

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