Уловка 22

The Chaplain

           "Thatwouldbepremeditatedmurder.Whydidn’tyoureporttheincidenttoMajorMajor?"

           "IdidreporttheincidenttoMajorMajor,"saidthecaptainsadly,"andMajorMajorsaidhewouldcutmythroatifIeverspoketohimagain."Themanstudiedthechaplainfearfully."Areyougoingtocutmythroat,too?"

           "Oh,no,no,no,"thechaplainassuredhim."Ofcoursenot.Doyoureallyliveintheforest?"Thecaptainnodded,andthechaplaingazedathisporousgraypalloroffatigueandmalnutritionwithamixtureofpityandesteem.Theman’sbodywasabonyshellinsiderumpledclothingthathungonhimlikeadisorderlycollectionofsacks.Wispsofdriedgrassweregluedalloverhim;heneededahaircutbadly.Thereweregreat,darkcirclesunderhiseyes.Thechaplainwasmovedalmosttotearsbytheharassed,bedraggledpicturethecaptainpresented,andhefilledwithdeferenceandcompassionatthethoughtofthemanysevererigorsthepoormanhadtoenduredaily.Inavoicehushedwithhumility,hesaid,"Whodoesyourlaundry?"Thecaptainpursedhislipsinabusinesslikemanner."Ihaveitdonebyawasherwomaninoneofthefarmhousesdowntheroad.Ikeepmythingsinmytrailerandsneakinsideonceortwiceadayforacleanhandkerchieforachangeofunderwear."

           "Whatwillyoudowhenwintercomes?"

           "Oh,Iexpecttobebackinthesquadronbythen,"thecaptainansweredwithakindofmartyredconfidence.

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