Уловка 22

Lieutenant Scheisskopf

           Didn’tyouwhisperthatwecouldn’tpunishyoutothatotherdirtysonofabitchwedon’tlike?What’shisname?"

           "Yossarian,sir,"LieutenantScheisskopfsaid.

           "Yes,Yossarian.That’sright.Yossarian.Yossarian?Isthathisname?Yossarian?WhatthehellkindofanameisYossarian?"

           LieutenantScheisskopfhadthefactsathisfingertips."It’sYossarian’sname,sir,"heexplained.

           "Yes,Isupposeitis.Didn’tyouwhispertoYossarianthatwecouldn’tpunishyou?"

           "Oh,no,sir.Iwhisperedtohimthatyoucouldn’tfindmeguilty"

           "Imaybestupid,"interruptedthecolonel,"butthedistinctionescapesme.IguessIamprettystupid,becausethedistinctionescapesme."

           "W"

           "You’reawindysonofabitch,aren’tyou?Nobodyaskedyouforclarificationandyou’regivingmeclarification.Iwasmakingastatement,notaskingforclarification.Youareawindysonofabitch,aren’tyou?"

           "No,sir."

           "No,sir?Areyoucallingmeagoddamliar?"

           "Oh,no,sir."

           "Thenyou’reawindysonofabitch,aren’tyou?"

           "No,sir."

           "Areyoutryingtopickafightwithme?"

           "No,sir."

           "Areyouawindysonofabitch?"

           "No,sir."

           "Goddammit,youaretryingtopickafightwithme.FortwostinkingcentsI’djumpoverthisbigfattableandripyourstinking,cowardlybodyapartlimbfromlimb."

           "Doit!Doit!"criedMajorMetcalf.

           "Metcalf,youstinkingsonofabitch.Didn’tItellyoutokeepyourstinking,cowardly,stupidmouthshut?"

           "Yes,sir.

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