Mr. Micawber’s Gauntlet

           UntilthedayarrivedonwhichIwastoentertainmynewly-foundoldfriends,IlivedprincipallyonDoraandcoffee.Inmylove-lorncondition,myappetitelanguished;andIwasgladofit,forIfeltasthoughitwouldhavebeenanactofperfidytowardsDoratohaveanaturalrelishformydinner.ThequantityofwalkingexerciseItook,wasnotinthisrespectattendedwithitsusualconsequence,asthedisappointmentcounteractedthefreshair.Ihavemydoubts,too,foundedontheacuteexperienceacquiredatthisperiodofmylife,whetherasoundenjoymentofanimalfoodcandevelopitselffreelyinanyhumansubjectwhoisalwaysintormentfromtightboots.Ithinktheextremitiesrequiretobeatpeacebeforethestomachwillconductitselfwithvigour.

           Ontheoccasionofthisdomesticlittleparty,Ididnotrepeatmyformerextensivepreparations.Imerelyprovidedapairofsoles,asmalllegofmutton,andapigeon-pie.Mrs.Cruppbrokeoutintorebelliononmyfirstbashfulhintinreferencetothecookingofthefishandjoint,andsaid,withadignifiedsenseofinjury,‘No!No,sir!Youwillnotaskmesichathing,foryouarebetteracquaintedwithmethantosupposemecapableofdoingwhatIcannotdowithampialsatisfactiontomyownfeelings!’But,intheend,acompromisewaseffected;andMrs.Cruppconsentedtoachievethisfeat,onconditionthatIdinedfromhomeforafortnightafterwards.

           AndhereImayremark,thatwhatIunderwentfromMrs.

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