Уловка 22

Havermyer

           "Why,"sworeYossarianathimapprovingly,"youevil-eyed,mechanicallyaptituded,disaffiliatedsonofabitch,didyouwalkaroundwithanythinginyourcheeks?"

           "Ididn’t,"Orrsaid,"walkaroundwithanythinginmycheeks.Iwalkedaroundwithcrabapplesinmycheeks.WhenIcouldn’tgetcrabapplesIwalkedaroundwithhorsechestnuts.Inmycheeks."

           Orrgiggled.Yossarianmadeuphismindtokeephismouthshutanddid.Orrwaited.Yossarianwaitedlonger.

           "Oneineachcheek,"Orrsaid.

           "Why?"

           Orrpounced."Whywhat?"

           Yossarianshookhishead,smiling,andrefusedtosay.

           "It’safunnythingaboutthisvalve,"Orrmusedaloud.

           "Whatis?"Yossarianasked.

           "BecauseIwanted"

           Yossarianknew."JesusChrist!Whydidyouwant"

           "applecheeks."

           "applecheeks?"Yossariandemanded.

           "Iwantedapplecheeks,"Orrrepeated."EvenwhenIwasakidIwantedapplecheekssomeday,andIdecidedtoworkatituntilIgotthem,andbyGod,IdidworkatituntilIgotthem,andthat’showIdidit,withcrabapplesinmycheeksalldaylong."Hegiggledagain."Oneineachcheek."

           "Whydidyouwantapplecheeks?"

           "Ididn’twantapplecheeks,"Orrsaid."Iwantedbigcheeks.Ididn’tcareaboutthecolorsomuch,butIwantedthembig.Iworkedatitjustlikeoneofthosecrazyguysyoureadaboutwhogoaroundsqueezingrubberballsalldaylongjusttostrengthentheirhands.Infact,Iwasoneofthosecrazyguys.Iusedtowalkaroundalldaywithrubberballsinmyhands,too."

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