Уловка 22

Milo the Mayor

           Milowasthecorngod,theraingodandthericegodinbackwardregionswheresuchcrudegodswerestillworshipedbyignorantandsuperstitiouspeople,anddeepinsidethejunglesofAfrica,heintimatedwithbecomingmodesty,largegravenimagesofhismustachedfacecouldbefoundoverlookingprimitivestonealtarsredwithhumanblood.Everywheretheytouchedhewasacclaimedwithhonor,anditwasonetriumphalovationafteranotherforhimincityaftercityuntiltheyfinallydoubledbackthroughtheMiddleEastandreachedCairo,whereMilocorneredthemarketoncottonthatnooneelseintheworldwantedandbroughthimselfpromptlytothebrinkofruin.InCairotherewasatlastroomatthehotelforYossarianandOrr.Thereweresoftbedsforthemwithfatfluffed-uppillowsandclean,crispsheets.Therewereclosetswithhangersfortheirclothes.Therewaswatertowashwith.YossarianandOrrsoakedtheirrancid,unfriendlybodiespinkinasteaming-hottubandthenwentfromthehotelwithMilotoeatshrimpcocktailsandfiletmignoninaveryfinerestaurantwithastocktickerinthelobbythathappenedtobeclickingoutthelatestquotationforEgyptiancottonwhenMiloinquiredofthecaptainofwaiterswhatkindofmachineitwas.Milohadneverimaginedamachinesobeautifulasastocktickerbefore.

           "Really?"heexclaimedwhenthecaptainofwaitershadfinishedhisexplanation."AndhowmuchisEgyptiancottonsellingfor?"Thecaptainofwaiterstoldhim,andMiloboughtthewholecrop.

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