Уловка 22

Major Major Major Major

           "Asyesow,soshallyereap,"hecounseledoneandall,andeveryonesaid,"Amen."

           MajorMajor’sfatherwasanoutspokenchampionofeconomyingovernment,provideditdidnotinterferewiththesacreddutyofgovernmenttopayfarmersasmuchastheycouldgetforallthealfalfatheyproducedthatnooneelsewantedorfornotproducinganyalfalfaatall.Hewasaproudandindependentmanwhowasopposedtounemploymentinsuranceandneverhesitatedtowhine,whimper,wheedle,andextortforasmuchashecouldgetfromwhomeverhecould.Hewasadevoutmanwhosepulpitwaseverywhere.

           "TheLordgaveusgoodfarmerstwostronghandssothatwecouldtakeasmuchaswecouldgrabwithbothofthem,"hepreachedwithardoronthecourthousestepsorinthefrontoftheA&Pashewaitedforthebad-temperedgum-chewingyoungcashierhewasaftertostepoutsideandgivehimanastylook."IftheLorddidn’twantustotakeasmuchaswecouldget,"hepreached,"Hewouldn’thavegivenustwogoodhandstotakeitwith."Andtheothersmurmured,"Amen."

           MajorMajor’sfatherhadaCalvinist’sfaithinpredestinationandcouldperceivedistinctlyhoweveryone’smisfortunesbuthisownwereexpressionsofGod’swill.Hesmokedcigarettesanddrankwhiskey,andhethrivedongoodwitandstimulatingintellectualconversation,particularlyhisownwhenhewaslyingabouthisageortellingthatgoodoneaboutGodandhiswife’sdifficultiesindeliveringMajorMajor.

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