Цветы для Элджернона

           Charlieisdrawingmedownintomyself.Istareinwardinthecenterofmyunseeingeyeattheredspotthattransformsitselfintoamultipetaledflower—theshimmering,swirling,luminescentflowerthatliesdeepinthecoreofmyunconscious.

           Iamshrinking.Notinthesenseoftheatomsofmybodybecomingcloserandmoredense,butafusion—astheatomsofmy-selfmergeintomicrocosm.Therewillbegreatheatandunbearablelight—thehellwithinhell—.butIdontlookatthelight,onlyattheflower,unmulti-plying,undividingitselfbackfromthemanytowardone.Andforaninstanttheshimmeringflowerturnsintothegoldendisktwirlingonastring,andthentothebubbleofswirlingrainbows,andfinallyIambackinthecavewhereeverythingisquietanddarkandIswimthewetlabyrinthsearchingforonetoreceiveme...embraceme...absorbme...intoitself.

           ThatImaybegin.

           InthecoreIseethelightagain,anopeninginthedarkestofcaves,nowtinyandfaraway—throughthewrongendofatelescope—brilliant,blinding,shimmer­ing,andonceagainthemultipetaledflower(swirlinglotus—thatfloatsneartheentranceoftheunconscious).AttheentranceofthatcaveIwillfindtheanswer,ifIdaregobackandplungethroughitintothegrottooflightbeyond.

           Notyet!

           Iamafraid.Notoflife,ordeath,ornothingness,butofwastingitasifIhadneverbeen.AndasIstartthroughtheopening,Ifeelthepressurearoundme,propellingmeinviolentwavelikemotionstowardthemouthofthecave.