Пятьдесят оттенков серого
Chapter 22
Tokeepmyselfawake,Istartalongstream-of-consciousnesse-mailtoChristianonmylaptop.
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From:AnastasiaSteele
Subject:Doyouliketoscareme?
Date:May31201106:52EST
To:ChristianGrey
YouknowhowmuchIdislikeyouspendingmoneyonme.Yes,you’reveryrich,butstillitmakesmeuncomfortable,likeyou’repayingmeforsex.However,Iliketravelingfirstclass,it’ssomuchmorecivilizedthancoach.Sothankyou.Imeanit—andIdidenjoythemassagefromJeanPaul.Hewasverygay.Iomittedthatbitinmye-mailtoyoutowindyouup,becauseIwasannoyedwithyou,andI’msorryaboutthat.
Butasusualyouoverreact.Youcan’twritethingslikethattome—boundandgaggedinacrate.(Wereyouseriousorwasitajoke?)Thatscaresme…youscareme…Iamcompletelycaughtupinyourspell,consideringalifestylewithyouthatIdidn’tevenknowexisteduntillastweek,andthenyouwritesomethinglikethatandIwanttorunscreamingintothehills.Iwon’t,ofcourse,becauseI’dmissyou.Reallymissyou.Iwantustowork,butIamterrifiedofthedepthoffeelingIhaveforyouandthedarkpathyou’releadingmedown.Whatyouareofferingiseroticandsexy,andI’mcurious,butI’malsoscaredyou’llhurtme—physicallyandemotionally.Afterthreemonthsyoucouldsaygood-bye,andwherewillthatleavemeifyoudo?ButthenIsupposethatriskisthereinanyrelationship.Thisjustisn’tthesortofrelationshipIeverenvisagedhaving,especiallyasmyfirst.It’sahugeleapoffaithforme.
