Тонкое искусство пофигизма

           “Withgreatpowercomesgreatresponsibility.”

           Itistrue.Butthere’sabetterversionofthisquote,aversionthatactuallyisprofound,andallyouhavetodoisswitchthenounsaround:“Withgreatresponsibilitycomesgreatpower.”

           Themorewechoosetoacceptresponsibilityinourlives,themorepowerwewillexerciseoverourlives.Acceptingresponsibilityforourproblemsisthusthefirststeptosolvingthem.

           Ionceknewamanwhowasconvincedthatthereasonnowomanwoulddatehimwasbecausehewastooshort.Hewaseducated,interesting,andgood-looking—agoodcatch,inprinciple—buthewasabsolutelyconvincedthatwomenfoundhimtooshorttodate.

           Andbecausehefeltthathewastooshort,hedidn’toftengooutandtrytomeetwomen.Thefewtimeshedid,hewouldhomeinonthesmallestbehaviorsfromanywomanhetalkedwiththatcouldpossiblyindicatehewasn’tattractiveenoughforherandthenconvincehimselfthatshedidn’tlikehim,evenifshereallydid.Asyoucanimagine,hisdatinglifesucked.

           Whathedidn’trealizewasthathehadchosenthevaluethatwashurtinghim:height.Women,heassumed,areattractedonlytoheight.Hewasscrewed,nomatterwhathedid.

           Thischoiceofvaluewasdisempowering.Itgavethismanareallycrappyproblem:notbeingtallenoughinaworldmeant(inhisview)fortallpeople.Therearefarbettervaluesthathecouldhaveadoptedinhisdatinglife.