Женщины

Chapter 26

           Mindypressedherbodyagainstmeandkissedme.Itwasalongkiss.Mycockrose.IhadrecentlybeentakingalotofvitaminE.Ihadmyownideasaboutsex.Iwasconstantlyhornyandmasturbatedcontinually.I’dmakelovetoLydiaandthencomebacktomyplaceandmasturbateinthemorning.Thethoughtofsexassomethingforbiddenexcitedmebeyondallreason.Itwaslikeoneanimalknifinganotherintosubmission.

           WhenIcameIfeltitwasinthefaceofeverythingdecent,whitespermdrippingdownovertheheadsandsoulsofmydeadparents.IfIhadbeenbornawomanIwouldcertainlyhavebeenaprostitute.SinceIhadbeenbornaman,Icravedwomenconstantly,thelowerthebetter.Andyetwomen-goodwomen-frightenedmebecausetheyeventuallywantedyoursoul,andwhatwasleftofmine,Iwantedtokeep.BasicallyIcravedprostitutes,basewomen,becausetheyweredeadlyandhardandmadenopersonaldemands.Nothingwaslostwhentheyleft.YetatthesametimeIyearnedforagentle,goodwoman,despitetheoverwhelmingprice.EitherwayIwaslost.Astrongmanwouldgiveupboth.Iwasn’tstrong.SoIcontinuedtostrugglewithwomen,withtheideaofwomen.

           MindyandIfinishedthebottleandthenwenttobed.Ikissedherforawhile,thenapologized,anddrewaway.Iwastoodrunktoperform.Onehellofagreatlover.Ipromisedhermanygreatexperiencesinthenearfuture,thenfellasleepwithherbodypressedagainstme.

           InthemorningIawakened,sickened

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