Пятьдесят оттенков серого
Chapter 10
WhatamIgoingtodo?Hisburninggrayeyesandthatintensesmolderingstarecomeintomymind’seye,andmybodytightensatthethought.Igasp.He’snotevenhereandI’mturnedon.Itjustcan’tbeaboutsex,canit?Irecallhisgentlebanterthismorningatbreakfast,hisjoyatmydelightwiththehelicopterride,himplayingthepiano—thesweet,soulful,oh-so-sadmusic.
He’ssuchacomplicatedperson.AndnowIhaveaninsightastowhy.Ayoungmandeprivedofhisadolescence,sexuallyabusedbysomeevilMrs.Robinsonfigure…nowonderhe’soldbeforehistime.Myheartfillswithsadnessatthethoughtofwhathemusthavebeenthrough.I’mtoonaïvetoknowexactlywhat,buttheresearchshouldshedsomelight.ButdoIreallywanttoknow?DoIwanttoexplorethisworldIknownothingabout?It’ssuchabigstep.
IfI’dnotmethim,I’dstillbesweetlyandblissfullyoblivious.Myminddriftstolastnightandthismorning…andtheincredible,sensualsexualityI’dexperienced.DoIwanttosaygood-byetothat?No!screamsmysubconscious…myinnergoddessnodsinsilentZen-likeagreementwithher.
Katewandersbackintothelivingroom,grinningfromeartoear.Perhapsshe’sinlove.Igapeather.She’sneverbehavedlikethis.
“Ana,I’mofftobed.I’mprettytired.”
“Me,too,Kate.”
Shehugsme.
“I’mgladyou’rebackinonepiece.There’ssomethingaboutChristian,”sheaddsquietly,apologetically
