Тонкое искусство пофигизма

           Thesepeoplehadexperiencedorwitnessedmassstarvation,bombingsthatturnedcitiestorubble,theHolocaust,thetortureofprisonersofwar,andtherapeand/ormurderoffamilymembers,ifnotbytheNazis,thenafewyearslaterbytheSoviets.

           AsDabrowskistudiedthesurvivors,henoticedsomethingbothsurprisingandamazing.Asizablepercentageofthembelievedthatthewartimeexperiencesthey’dsuffered,althoughpainfulandindeedtraumatic,hadactuallycausedthemtobecomebetter,moreresponsible,andyes,evenhappierpeople.Manydescribedtheirlivesbeforethewarasifthey’dbeendifferentpeoplethen:ungratefulforandunappreciativeoftheirlovedones,lazyandconsumedbypettyproblems,entitledtoallthey’dbeengiven.Afterthewartheyfeltmoreconfident,moresureofthemselves,moregrateful,andunfazedbylife’strivialitiesandpettyannoyances.

           Obviously,theirexperienceshadbeenhorrific,andthesesurvivorsweren’thappyabouthavinghadtoexperiencethem.Manyofthemstillsufferedfromtheemotionalscarsthelashingsofwarhadleftonthem.Butsomeofthemhadmanagedtoleveragethosescarstotransformthemselvesinpositiveandpowerfulways.

           Andtheyaren’taloneinthatreversal.Formanyofus,ourproudestachievementscomeinthefaceofthegreatestadversity.Ourpainoftenmakesusstronger,moreresilient,moregrounded.Manycancersurvivors,forexample,reportfeelingstrongerandmoregratefulafterwinningtheirbattletosurvive.