Тонкое искусство пофигизма
Chapter 7
Ifsomeoneisbetterthanyouatsomething,thenit’slikelybecauseshehasfailedatitmorethanyouhave.Ifsomeoneisworsethanyou,it’slikelybecausehehasn’tbeenthroughallofthepainfullearningexperiencesyouhave.
Ifyouthinkaboutayoungchildtryingtolearntowalk,thatchildwillfalldownandhurtitselfhundredsoftimes.Butatnopointdoesthatchildeverstopandthink,“Oh,Iguesswalkingjustisn’tforme.I’mnotgoodatit.”
Avoidingfailureissomethingwelearnatsomelaterpointinlife.I’msurealotofitcomesfromoureducationsystem,whichjudgesrigorouslybasedonperformanceandpunishesthosewhodon’tdowell.Anotherlargeshareofitcomesfromoverbearingorcriticalparentswhodon’tlettheirkidsscrewupontheirownoftenenough,andinsteadpunishthemfortryinganythingnewornotpreordained.Andthenwehaveallthemassmediathatconstantlyexposeustostellarsuccessaftersuccess,whilenotshowingusthethousandsofhoursofdullpracticeandtediumthatwererequiredtoachievethatsuccess.
Atsomepoint,mostofusreachaplacewherewe’reafraidtofail,whereweinstinctivelyavoidfailureandstickonlytowhatisplacedinfrontofusoronlywhatwe’realreadygoodat.
Thisconfinesusandstiflesus.Wecanbetrulysuccessfulonlyatsomethingwe’rewillingtofailat.Ifwe’reunwillingtofail,thenwe’reunwillingtosucceed.
Alotofthisfearoffailurecomesfromhavingchosenshittyvalues.
