Цветы для Элджернона

PROGRESS REPORT 16

           Normascreamedather:"Mother!Putdownthatknife!"

           SeeingRosestandingtherewiththeknifebroughtbackthepictureofthatnightshehadforcedMatttotakemeaway.Shewasrelivingthatnow.Icouldn’tspeakormove.Thenauseasweptoverme,thechokingtension,thebuzzinginmyears,mystomachknottingandstretchingasifitwantedtotearitselfoutofmybody.

           Shehadaknife,andAlicehadaknife,andmyfatherhadaknife,andDr.Strausshadaknife...,

           Fortunately,Normahadthepresenceofmindtotakeitawayfromher,butshecouldn’terasethefearinRose’seyesasshescreamedatme."Gethimoutofhere!He’sgotnorighttolookathissisterwithsexinhismind!"

           Rosescreamedandsankbackintothechair,weeping.

           Ididn’tknowwhattosay,andneitherdidNorma.Wewerebothembarrassed.NowsheknewwhyIhadbeensentaway.

           IwonderedifIhadeverdoneanythingtojustifymymother’sfear.Therewerenosuchmemories,buthowcouldIbesurethereweren’thorriblethoughtsrepressedbehindthebarriersofmytorturedconscience?Inthesealed-offpassageways,beyondblindalleys,thatIwouldneversee.PossiblyIwillneverknow."Whateverthetruthis,ImustnothateRoseforprotectingNorma.Imustunderstandthewayshesawit.UnlessIforgiveher,Iwillhavenothing.

           Normawastrembling.

           "Takeiteasy,"Isaid."Shedoesn’tknowwhatshe’sdoing.Itwasn’tmeshewasravingat.ItwastheoldChar­lie.Shewasafraidofwhathemightdotoyou.Ican’tblameherforwantingtoprotectyou.

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