Цветы для Элджернона

           Mostmenaregentleandtenderwithawoman.Theymakeloveslowly,withcaressesandkissesfirst."Shelookedatmemeaningfully,andletheropenpalmbrushbackandforthagainstmine.

           ItwaswhatIhadheardabout,readabout,dreamedabout.Ididn’tknowhername,andshedidn’taskmine.Shejustwantedmetotakehersomeplacewherewecouldbealone.IwonderedwhatAlicewouldthink.

           Icaressedherawkwardlyandkissedherstillmorehes-itantlysothatshelookedupatme."What’sthematter?"shewhispered."Whatareyouthinking?"

           "Aboutyou."

           "Doyouhaveaplacewecango?"

           Eachstepforwardwascaution.Atwhatpointwouldthegroundgivewayandplungemeintoanxiety?Some­thingkeptmemovingaheadtotestmyfooting.

           "Ifyoudon’thaveaplace,theMansionHotelonFifty-thirddoesn’tcosttoomuch.Andtheydon’tbotheryouaboutluggageifyoupayinadvance."

           "Ihavearoom—"

           Shelookedatmewithnewrespect."Well,that’sfine."

           Stillnothing.Andthatinitselfwascurious.HowfarcouldIgowithoutbeingoverwhelmedbysymptomsofpanic?Whenwewerealoneintheroom?Whensheundressed?WhenIsawherbody?Whenwewerelyingtogether?

           Suddenly,itwasimportanttoknowifIcouldbelikeothermen,ifIcouldeveraskawomantosharealifewithme.Havingintelligenceandknowledgewasn’tenough.Iwantedthis,too.Thesenseofreleaseandloosenesswasstrongnowwiththefeelingthatitwaspossible.