Над пропастью во ржи

           Allthosescraggy-lookingSantaClauseswerestandingoncornersringingthosebells,andtheSalvationArmygirls,theonesthatdon’twearanylipstickoranything,weretingingbellstoo.IsortofkeptlookingaroundforthosetwonunsI’dmetatbreakfastthedaybefore,butIdidn’tseethem.IknewIwouldn’t,becausethey’dtoldmethey’dcometoNewYorktobeschoolteachers,butIkeptlookingforthemanyway.Anyway,itwasprettyChristmasyallofasudden.Amillionlittlekidsweredowntownwiththeirmothers,gettingonandoffbusesandcominginandoutofstores.IwishedoldPhoebewasaround.She’snotlittleenoughanymoretogostarkstaringmadinthetoydepartment,butsheenjoyshorsingaroundandlookingatthepeople.TheChristmasbeforelastItookherdowntownshoppingwithme.Wehadahelluvatime.IthinkitwasinBloomingdale’s.Wewentintheshoedepartmentandwepretendedshe—oldPhoebe—wantedtogetapairofthoseveryhighstormshoes,thekindthathaveaboutamillionholestolaceup.Wehadthepoorsalesmanguygoingcrazy.OldPhoebetriedonabouttwentypairs,andeachtimethepoorguyhadtolaceoneshoeallthewayup.Itwasadirtytrick,butitkilledoldPhoebe.Wefinallyboughtapairofmoccasinsandchargedthem.Thesalesmanwasveryniceaboutit.Ithinkheknewwewerehorsingaround,becauseoldPhoebealwaysstartsgiggling.

           Anyway,IkeptwalkingandwalkingupFifthAvenue,withoutanytieonoranything.Thenallofasudden,somethingveryspookystartedhappening.EverytimeIcametotheendofablockandsteppedoffthegoddamcurb,IhadthisfeelingthatI’dnevergettotheothersideofthestreet.IthoughtI’djustgodown,down,down,andnobody’deverseemeagain.Boy,diditscareme.Youcan’timagine.Istartedsweatinglikeabastard—mywholeshirtandunderwearandeverything.