Над пропастью во ржи

           Itstartsoutwhenthey’reyoungandall,andthegirl’sparentsdon’twanthertomarrytheboy,butshemarrieshimanyway.Thentheykeepgettingolderandolder.Thehusbandgoestowar,andthewifehasthisbrotherthat’sadrunkard.Icouldn’tgetveryinterested.ImeanIdidn’tcaretoomuchwhenanybodyinthefamilydiedoranything.Theywerealljustabunchofactors.Thehusbandandwifewereaprettyniceoldcouple—verywittyandall—butIcouldn’tgettoointerestedinthem.Foronething,theykeptdrinkingteaorsomegoddamthingallthroughtheplay.Everytimeyousawthem,somebutlerwasshovingsometeainfrontofthem,orthewifewaspouringitforsomebody.Andeverybodykeptcominginandgoingoutallthetime—yougotdizzywatchingpeoplesitdownandstandup.AlfredLuntandLynnFontanneweretheoldcouple,andtheywereverygood,butIdidn’tlikethemmuch.Theyweredifferent,though,I’llsaythat.Theydidn’tactlikepeopleandtheydidn’tactlikeactors.It’shardtoexplain.Theyactedmoreliketheyknewtheywerecelebritiesandall.Imeantheyweregood,buttheyweretoogood.Whenoneofthemgotfinishedmakingaspeech,theotheronesaidsomethingveryfastrightafterit.Itwassupposedtobelikepeoplereallytalkingandinterruptingeachotherandall.Thetroublewas,itwastoomuchlikepeopletalkingandinterruptingeachother.TheyactedalittlebitthewayoldErnie,downintheVillage,playsthepiano.Ifyoudosomethingtoogood,then,afterawhile,ifyoudon’twatchit,youstartshowingoff.Andthenyou’renotasgoodanymore.Butanyway,theyweretheonlyonesintheshow—theLunts,Imean—thatlookedliketheyhadanyrealbrains.Ihavetoadmitit.

           Attheendofthefirstactwewentoutwithalltheotherjerksforacigarette.Whatadealthatwas.