All Alone

           Itwaseasytopromiseself-abnegationwhenselfwaswrappedupinanother,andheartandsoulwerepurifiedbyasweetexample.Butwhenthehelpfulvoicewassilent,thedailylessonover,thebelovedpresencegone,andnothingremainedbutlonelinessandgrief,thenJofoundherpromiseveryhardtokeep.Howcouldshe‘comfortFatherandMother’whenherownheartachedwithaceaselesslongingforhersister,howcouldshe‘makethehousecheerful’whenallitslightandwarmthandbeautyseemedtohavedeserteditwhenBethlefttheoldhomeforthenew,andwhereinalltheworldcouldshe‘findsomeuseful,happyworktodo’,thatwouldtaketheplaceofthelovingservicewhichhadbeenitsownreward?Shetriedinablind,hopelesswaytodoherduty,secretlyrebellingagainstitallthewhile,foritseemedunjustthatherfewjoysshouldbelessened,herburdensmadeheavier,andlifegetharderandharderasshetoiledalong.Somepeopleseemedtogetallsunshine,andsomeallshadow.Itwasnotfair,forshetriedmorethanAmytobegood,butnevergotanyreward,onlydisappointment,troubleandhardwork.

           PoorJo,theseweredarkdaystoher,forsomethinglikedespaircameoverherwhenshethoughtofspendingallherlifeinthatquiethouse,devotedtohumdrumcares,afewsmallpleasures,andthedutythatneverseemedtogrowanyeasier."Ican’tdoit.