Американские боги

           HehadnotseenmanyepisodesofTheDickVanDykeShow,sohewasnotsurprisedthatitwasanepisodehecouldnotrememberseeingbefore.Whathefoundstrangewasthetone.

           AlltheregularswereconcernedaboutRob’sdrinking:hewasmissingdaysatwork.Theywenttohishome:hehadlockedhimselfinthebedroom,andhadtobepersuadedtocomeout:hewasstaggeringdrunk,butstillprettyfunny.Hisfriends,playedbyMoreyAmsterdamandRoseMarie,leftaftergettingsomegoodgagsin.Then,whenRob’swifewenttoremonstratewithhim,hehither,hard,intheface.Shesatdownonthefloorandbegantocry,notinthatfamousMaryTylerMoorewail,butinsmall,helplesssobs,huggingherselfandwhispering,"Don’thitme,please,I’lldoanything,justdon’thitmeanymore."

           "Whatthefuckisthis?"saidShadow,aloud.

           Thepicturedissolvedintophosphor-dotfuzz.Whenitcameback,TheDickVanDykeShowhad,inexplicably,becomeILoveLucy.LucywastryingtopersuadeRickytoletherreplacetheiroldiceboxwithanewrefrigerator.Whenheleft,however,shewalkedovertothecouchandsatdown,crossingherankles,restingherhandsinherlap,andstaringoutpatientlyinblackandwhiteacrosstheyears.

           "Shadow?"shesaid."Weneedtotalk."

           Shadowsaidnothing.Sheopenedherpurseandtookoutacigarette,lititwithanexpensivesilverlighter,putthelighteraway."I’mtalkingtoyou,"shesaid.