1984

           ‘Andwasitusual—I’monlyquotingwhatI’vereadinhistorybooks—wasitusualforthesepeopleandtheirservantstopushyouoffthepavementintothegutter?’ 

           ‘Oneof’empushedmeonce,’saidtheoldman. ‘Irecollectitasifitwasyesterday. ItwasBoatRacenight—terriblyrowdytheyusedtogetonBoatRacenight—andIbumpsintoayoungblokeonShaftesburyAvenue. Quiteagent,’ewas—dressshirt,top’at,blackovercoat. ‘Ewaskindofzig-zaggingacrossthepavement,andIbumpsinto’imaccidental-like. ‘Esays,"Whycan’tyoulookwhereyou’regoing?"’esays. Isay,"Juthinkyou’veboughtthebleedingpavement?" ‘Esays,"I’lltwistyourbloody’eadoffifyougetfreshwithme." Isays,"You’redrunk.I’llgiveyouinchargein’alfaminute,"Isays. An’ifyou’llbelieveme,’eputs’is’andonmychestandgivesmeashoveasprettynearsentmeunderthewheelsofabus. Well,Iwasyounginthemdays,andIwasgoingto’avefetched’imone,only——’ 

           AsenseofhelplessnesstookholdofWinston. Theoldman’smemorywasnothingbutarubbish-heapofdetails. Onecouldquestionhimalldaywithoutgettinganyrealinformation. Thepartyhistoriesmightstillbetrue,afterafashion: theymightevenbecompletelytrue. Hemadealastattempt. 

           ‘PerhapsIhavenotmademyselfclear,’hesaid. ‘WhatI’mtryingtosayisthis. Youhavebeenaliveaverylongtime; youlivedhalfyourlifebeforetheRevolution. In1925,forinstance,youwerealreadygrownup. Wouldyousayfromwhatyoucanremember,thatlifein1925wasbetterthanitisnow,orworse? Ifyoucouldchoose,wouldyouprefertolivethenornow?’ 

           Theoldmanlookedmeditativelyatthedartsboard. Hefinisheduphisbeer,moreslowlythanbefore. Whenhespokeitwaswithatolerantphilosophicalair,asthoughthebeerhadmellowedhim.