Коллекционер

           Itwasamonthaftertheeveningoftherecord.Ioughttohaveguessed,shehadbeenpurringovermefordays,givingmearchlooks.IthoughtitwassomethingtodowithPiers.AndthenoneeveningIrangthebellandthenInoticedthelockwasup,soIpushedthedooropenandlookedupthestairs,atthesametimeasToinettelookeddownroundthedoor.Andwewerelookingateachother.Afteramomentshecameoutonthelandingandshewasdressing.Shedidn’tsayanything,shejustgesturedmetocomeupandintothestudioandwhatwasworst,Iwasred,andshewasnot.Shewasjustamused.

           Don’tlooksoshocked,shesaid.He’llbebackinaminute.He’sjustgoneoutfor...butIneverheardwhatitwas,becauseIwent.

           I’veneverreallyanalyzedwhyIwassoangryandsoshockedandsohurt.Donald,Piers,David,everyoneknowsshelivesinLondonasshelivedinStockholm—she’stoldmeherself,they’vetoldme.AndG.P.hadtoldmewhathewaslike.

           Itwasnotjustjealousy.ItwasthatsomeonelikeG.P.couldbesoclosetosomeonelikeher—someonesorealandsomeonesoshallow,sophoney,soloose.Butwhyshouldhehaveconsideredmeatall?There’snotasinglereason.

           He’stwenty-oneyearsolderthanIam.NineyearsyoungerthanD.

           Fordaysafterwardsitwasn’tG.P.Iwasdisgustedwith,butmyself.Atmynarrow-mindedness.Iforcedmyselftomeet,tolistentoToinette.Shedidn’tcrowatall.IthinkthatmusthavebeenG.P.’sdoing.Heorderedhernotto.