Коллекционер

           AndthenDavidEvanscominguptomelastmonthandactuallyadmittingithadchangedhim,thatevening.)

           8.Youhatethepoliticalbusinessofnationality.Youhateeverything,inpoliticsandartandeverythingelse,thatisnotgenuineanddeepandnecessary.Youdon’thaveanytimeforsillytrivialthings.Youliveseriously.Youdon’tgotosillyfilms,evenifyouwantto;youdon’treadcheapnewspapers;youdon’tlistentotrashonthewirelessandthetelly;youdon’twastetimetalkingaboutnothing.Youuseyourlife.

           Imusthavealwayswantedtobelieveinthosethings;Ididbelieveintheminavaguesortofway,beforeImethim.Buthe’smademebelievethem;it’sthethoughtofhimthatmakesmefeelguiltywhenIbreaktherules.

           Ifhe’smademebelievethem,thatmeanshe’smadealargepartofthenewme.

           IfIhadafairygodmother—please,makeG.P.twentyyearsyounger.Andplease,makehimphysicallyattractivetome.

           Howhewoulddespisethat!

           It’sodd(andIfeelalittleguilty)butIhavebeenfeelinghappiertodaythanatanytimesinceIcamehere.Afeeling—allwillturnoutforthebest.PartlybecauseIdidsomethingthismorning.Itriedtoescape.Then,Calibanhasacceptedit.Imeanifhewasgoingtoattackme,he’dsurelydoitatsometimewhenhehadareasontobeangry.Ashewasthismorning.Hehastremendousself-control,insomeways.

           IknowIalsofeelhappybecauseI’vebeennothereformostoftheday.I’vebeenmainlythinkingaboutG.P.