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Chapter 12

Hewon’tlivewithmeorletmemakeahomeforhim;hedoesn’twantourchildren.Idon’tlovehim—Ineverdidlovehimthewayawomanoughttolovethemanshemarries,andmaybehesenseditfromthewordgo.MaybeifIhadlovedhim,hewouldhaveacteddifferently.SohowcanIblamehim?I’veonlymyselftoblame,Ithink."

"It’stheArchbishopyoulove,isn’tit?"

"Oh,eversinceIwasalittlegirl!Iwashardonhimwhenhecame.PoorRalph!IhadnorighttosaywhatIdidtohim,becauseheneverencouragedme,youknow.Ihopehe’shadtimetounderstandthatIwasinpain,wornout,andterriblyunhappy.AllIcouldthinkwasitoughtbyrightstobehischildanditneverwouldbe,nevercouldbe.Itisn’tfair!Protestantclergycanmarry,whycan’tCatholic?Anddon’ttrytotellmeministersdon’tcarefortheirflocksthewaypriestsdo,becauseIwon’tbelieveyou.I’vemetheartlesspriestsandwonderfulministers.ButbecauseofthecelibacyofpriestsI’vehadtogoawayfromRalph,makemyhomeandmylifewithsomeoneelse,havesomeoneelse’sbaby.Anddoyouknowsomething,Anne?That’sasdisgustingasinasRalphbreakinghisvows,ormoreso.IresenttheChurch’simplicationthatmylovingRalphorhislovingmeiswrong!"