Пролетая над гнездом кукушки

           BeforeanybodycanturntolookformeIduckbackinthemopcloset,jerkthedoorshutdarkafterme,holdmybreath.Shavingbeforeyougetbreakfastistheworsttime.Whenyougotsomethingunderyourbeltyou’restrongerandmorewideawake,andthebastardswhoworkfortheCombinearen’tsoapttosliponeoftheirmachinesinonyouinplaceofanelectricshaver.Butwhenyoushavebeforebreakfastlikeshehasmedosomemornings—six-thirtyinthemorninginaroomallwhitewallsandwhitebasins,andlong-tube-lightsintheceilingmakingsuretherearen’tanyshadows,andfacesallroundyoutrappedscreamingbehindthemirrors—thenwhatchanceyougotagainstoneoftheirmachines?

           Ihideinthemopclosetandlisten,myheartbeatinginthedark,andItrytokeepfromgettingscared,trytogetmythoughtsoffsomeplaceelse—trytothinkbackandrememberthingsaboutthevillageandthebigColumbiaRiver,thinkaboutahonetimePapaandmewerehuntingbirdsinastandofcedartreesnearTheDalles....ButlikealwayswhenItrytoplacemythoughtsinthepastandhidethere,thefearcloseathandseepsinthroughthememory.Icanfeelthatleastblackboyouttherecomingupthehall,smellingoutformyfear.Heopensouthisnostrilslikeblackfunnels,hisoutsizedheadbobbingthiswayandthatashesniffs,andhesucksinfearfromallovertheward.He’ssmellingmenow,Icanhearhimsnort.Hedon’tknowwhereI’mhid,buthe’ssmellingandhe’shuntingaround.Itrytokeepstill....

           (Papatellsmetokeepstill,tellsmethatthedogsensesabirdsomewheresrightclose.WeborrowedapointerdogfromamaninTheDalles.Allthevillagedogsareno-‘countmongrels,Papasays,fish-guteatersandnoclassa-tall;thisheredog,hegotinsteek!Idon’tsayanything,butIalreadyseethebirdupinascrubcedar,hunchedinagrayknotoffeathers.