Таинственный сад
XXVII. In The Garden
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AndhewentthroughthegardentothevillaandorderedPitchertoprepareforhisreturntoEngland.
InafewdayshewasinYorkshireagain,andonhislongrailroadjourneyhefoundhimselfthinkingofhisboyashehadneverthoughtinallthetenyearspast.Duringthoseyearshehadonlywishedtoforgethim.Now,thoughhedidnotintendtothinkabouthim,memoriesofhimconstantlydriftedintohismind.Herememberedtheblackdayswhenhehadravedlikeamadmanbecausethechildwasaliveandthemotherwasdead.Hehadrefusedtoseeit,andwhenhehadgonetolookatitatlastithadbeen,suchaweakwretchedthingthateveryonehadbeensureitwoulddieinafewdays.Buttothesurpriseofthosewhotookcareofitthedayspassedanditlivedandtheneveryonebelieveditwouldbeadeformedandcrippledcreature.
Hehadnotmeanttobeabadfather,buthehadnotfeltlikeafatheratall.Hehadsupplieddoctorsandnursesandluxuries,buthehadshrunkfromthemerethoughtoftheboyandhadburiedhimselfinhisownmisery.Thefirsttimeafterayear’sabsencehereturnedtoMisselthwaiteandthesmallmiserablelookingthinglanguidlyandindifferentlyliftedtohisfacethegreatgrayeyeswithblacklashesroundthem,solikeandyetsohorriblyunlikethehappyeyeshehadadored,hecouldnotbearthesightofthemandturnedawaypaleasdeath.Afterthathescarcelyeversawhimexceptwhenhewasasleep,andallheknewofhimwasthathewasaconfirmedinvalid,withavicious,hysterical,half-insanetemper.