Chapter 22
Yetitwaswhenshehadgotoff—andImissedheronthespot—thatthegreatpinchreallycame.IfIhadcountedonwhatitwouldgivemetofindmyselfalonewithMiles,Ispeedilyperceived,atleast,thatitwouldgivemeameasure.NohourofmystayinfactwassoassailedwithapprehensionsasthatofmycomingdowntolearnthatthecarriagecontainingMrs.Groseandmyyoungerpupilhadalreadyrolledoutofthegates.NowIwas,Isaidtomyself,facetofacewiththeelements,andformuchoftherestoftheday,whileIfoughtmyweakness,IcouldconsiderthatIhadbeensupremelyrash.ItwasatighterplacestillthanIhadyetturnedroundin;allthemorethat,forthefirsttime,Icouldseeintheaspectofothersaconfusedreflectionofthecrisis.Whathadhappenednaturallycausedthemalltostare;therewastoolittleoftheexplained,throwoutwhateverwemight,inthesuddennessofmycolleague’sact.Themaidsandthemenlookedblank;theeffectofwhichonmynerveswasanaggravationuntilIsawthenecessityofmakingitapositiveaid.Itwasprecisely,inshort,byjustclutchingthehelmthatIavoidedtotalwreck;andIdaresaythat,tobearupatall,Ibecame,thatmorning,verygrandandverydry.IwelcomedtheconsciousnessthatIwaschargedwithmuchtodo,andIcausedittobeknownaswellthat,leftthustomyself,Iwasquiteremarkablyfirm.Iwanderedwiththatmanner,forthenexthourortwo,allovertheplaceandlooked,Ihavenodoubt,asifIwerereadyforanyonset.