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The Face without Pain or Fear or Guilt

           

           IcannotworkunderthetermsofDirective10-289thoughnotforthereasonitsperpetratorsintended.Iknowthattheirabolitionofallscientificresearchdoesnotmeanadamntoyouorme,andthatyouwouldwantmetocontinue.ButIhavetoquit,becauseIdonotwishtosucceedanylonger.

           Idonotwishtoworkinaworldthatregardsmeasaslave.Idonotwishtobeofanyvaluetopeople.IfIsucceededinrebuildingthemotor,Iwouldnotletyouplaceitintheirservice.Iwouldnottakeituponmyconsciencethatanythingproducedbymymindshouldbeusedtobringthemcomfort.

           Iknowthatifwesucceed,theywillbeonlytooeagertoexpropriatethemotor.Andforthesakeofthatprospect,wehavetoacceptthepositionofcriminals,youandI,andliveunderthethreatofbeingarrestedatanymomentattheirwhim.AndthisisthethingthatIcannottake,evenwereIabletotakealltherest:thatinordertogivethemaninestimablebenefit,weshouldbemademartyrstothemenwho,butforus,couldnothaveconceivedofit.Imighthaveforgiventherest,butwhenIthinkofthis,Isay:Maytheybedamned,Iwillseethemalldieofstarvation,myselfincluded,ratherthanforgivethemforthisorpermitit!

           Totellyouthefulltruth,Iwanttosucceed,tosolvethesecretofthemotor,asmuchasever.SoIshallcontinuetoworkonitformyownsolepleasureandforaslongasIlast.ButifIsolveit,itwillremainmyprivatesecret.

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