Коллекционер

           ButIstillhatehim.

           WithCalibanit’sasifsomebodymadehimdrinkawholebottleofwhisky.Hecan’ttakeit.Theonlythingthatkepthimdecentbeforewasbeingpoor.Beingstucktooneplaceandonejob.

           It’slikeputtingablindmaninafastcarandtellinghimtodrivewhereandhowhelikes.

           Anicethingtoendwith.TheBachrecordcametoday,I’veplayedittwicealready.Calibansaiditwasnice,buthewasn’t"musical."However,hesatwiththerightsortofexpressiononhisface.I’mgoingtoplaythepartsIlikeagain.I’mgoingtolieinbedinthedarknessandthemusicandthinkI’mwithG.P.andhe’slyingovertherewithhiseyesshutandhispittedcheekandhisJew’snose;asifhewasonhisowntomb.Onlythere’snothingofdeathinhim.

           Evenso.ThiseveningCalibanwaslatecomingdown.

           Where’veyoubeen,Isnappedathim.Hejustlookedsurprised,saidnothing.Isaid,youseemsolate.

           Ridiculous.Iwantedhimtocome.Ioftenwanthimtocome.I’maslonelyasthat.

           November10th

           Wehadanargumentthiseveningabouthismoney.Isaidheoughttogivemostofitaway.Itriedtoshamehimintogivingsomeaway.Buthewon’ttrustanything.That’swhat’sreallywrongwithhim.LikemymaninHampstead,hedoesn’ttrustpeopletocollectmoneyanduseitforthepurposetheysaytheywill.Hethinkseveryoneiscorrupt,everyonetriestogetmoneyandkeepit.

           It’snogoodmysayingIknowit’susedfortherightpurpose.