Коллекционер

           Itwasalloverinfiveseconds,shewasbackwiththeyoungman,buthearinghervoiceturnedherfromasortofdreampersontoarealone.Ican’tsaywhatwasspecialinhervoice.Ofcourseitwasveryeducated,butitwasn’tla-di-da,itwasn’tslimy,shedidn’tbegthecigarettesorlikedemandthem,shejustaskedfortheminaneasywayandyoudidn’thaveanyclassfeeling.Shespokelikeshewalked,asyoumightsay.

           IpaidasquickaspossibleandwentbacktothevanandtheCremorneandmyroom.Iwasreallyupset.ItwaspartlythatshehadtoborrowcigarettesbecauseshehadnomoneyandIhadsixtythousandpounds(IgaveAuntAnnieten)readytolayatherfeet—becausethatishowIfelt.IfeltIwoulddoanythingtoknowher,topleaseher,tobeherfriend,tobeabletowatchheropenly,notspyonher.ToshowhowIwas,Iputfivefive-poundnotesIhadonmeinanenvelopeandaddressedittoMissMirandaGrey,theSladeSchoolofArt...onlyofcourseIdidn’tpostit.IwouldhaveifIcouldhaveseenherfacewhensheopenedit.

           ThatwasthedayIfirstgavemyselfthedreamthatcametrue.ItbeganwhereshewasbeingattackedbyamanandIranupandrescuedher.ThensomehowIwasthemanthatattackedher,onlyIdidn’thurther;IcapturedheranddroveheroffinthevantoaremotehouseandthereIkepthercaptiveinaniceway.Graduallyshecametoknowmeandlikemeandthedreamgrewintotheoneaboutourlivinginanicemodernhouse,married,withkidsandeverything.

           Ithauntedme.Itkeptmeawakeatnights,itmademeforgetwhatIwasdoingduringtheday.IstayedonandonattheCremorne.Itstoppedbeingadream,itbegantobewhatIpretendedwasreallygoingtohappen(ofcourse,Ithoughtitwasonlypretending)soIthoughtofwaysandmeans—allthethingsIwouldhavetoarrangeandthinkaboutandhowI’ddoitandall.