Поющие в терновнике

           OrsoRainerinterpretedit,forthewordingoftheCardinal’swillwasquiteimpersonal.Itcouldnotdarebeotherwise.

           Hethrewthepacketintothebasketforgeneralnon-secretcorrespondence,immediatereply,andopenedtheletterfromJustine.Itbeganbadly,withoutanykindofsalutation.

           Thankyouforthecable.You’venoideahowgladIamthatwehaven’tbeenintouchtheselastcoupleofweeks,becauseIwouldhavehatedtohaveyouaround.AtthetimeallIcouldthinkwhenIthoughtofyouwas,thankGodyoudidn’tknow.Youmayfindthishardtounderstand,butIdon’twantyouanywherenearme.Thereisnothingprettyaboutgrief,Rain,noranywayyourwitnessingminecouldalleviateit.Indeed,youmightsaythishasprovedtomehowlittleIloveyou.IfIdidtrulyloveyouI’dturntoyouinstinctively,wouldn’tI?ButIfindmyselfturningaway.

           ThereforeIwouldmuchratherthatwecallitquitsforgoodandall,Rain.Ihavenothingtogiveyou,andIwantnothingfromyou.Thishastaughtmehowmuchpeoplemeanifthey’rearoundfortwenty-sixyears.Icouldn’tbearevertogothroughthisagain,andyousaidityourself,remember?Marriageornothing.Well,Ielectnothing.

           MymothertellsmetheoldCardinaldiedafewhoursafterIleftDrogheda.Funny.Mumwasquitecutupabouthisdying.Notthatshesaidanything,butIknowher.BeatsmewhysheandDaneandyoulikedhimsomuch.Inevercould,Ithoughthewastoosmarmyforwords.AnopinionI’mnotpreparedtochangejustbecausehe’sdead.

           Andthat’sit.