Если я останусь

           Hereachedintothebagandpulledoutclunkyblackleathernumberswithmetalbarsacrossthetops.

           "Nice,"Isaid."Ithinkmymomhasapairlikethem."

           "You’rejustjealousbecauseyoudon’thavesucharockin’costume.AndI’llbewearingtights,too.I’mjustthatsecureinmymanhood.Also,Ihaveawig."

           "Where’dyougetallthis?"Iasked,fingeringthewig.Itfeltlikeitwasmadeofburlap.

           "Online.Onlyahundredbucks."

           "YouspentahundreddollarsonaHalloweencostume?"

           AtthementionoftheworldHalloween,Teddyzoomeddownthestairs,ignoringmeandyankingonAdam’swalletchain."Waithere!"hedemanded,andthenranbackupstairsandreturnedafewsecondslaterholdingabag."Isthisagoodcostume?Orwillitmakemelookbabyish?"Teddyasked,pullingoutapitchfork,asetofdevilears,aredtail,andapairofredfeetiepajamas.

           "Ohh."Adamsteppedbackward,hiseyeswide."Thatoutfitscaresthehelloutofmeandyouaren’tevenwearingit."

           "Really?Youdon’tthinkthepajamasmakeitlookdumb.Idon’twantanyonetolaughatme,"Teddydeclared,hiseyebrowsfurrowedinseriousness.

           IgrinnedatAdam,whowastryingtoswallowhisownsmile."Redpajamaspluspitchforkplusdevilearsandpointytailissofullysatanicnoonewoulddarechallengeyou,lesttheyrisketernaldamnation,"Adamassuredhim.

           Teddy’sfacebrokeintoawidegrin,showingoffthegapofhismissingfronttooth.