Если я останусь

           OrIcanhearthefeedbackwhenDeadMoonplayed"D.O.A."attheX-Ray,eventhoughI’veneverheardDeadMoonplaylive,eventhoughtheX-RayCaféshutdownbeforeIwasborn.Butsometimesthememoriesfeelsoreal,sovisceral,sopersonal,thatIconfusethemwithmyown.

           Inevertoldanyoneaboutthese"memories."Momprobablywould’vesaidthatIwasthere—asoneoftheeggsinherovaries.Dadwould’vejokedthatheandMomhadtorturedmewiththeirstoriesonetoomanytimesandhadinadvertentlybrainwashedme.AndGranwould’vetoldmethatmaybeIwasthereasanangelbeforeIchosetobecomeMomandDad’skid.

           ButnowIwonder.AndnowIhope.BecausewhenIgo,IwanttorememberKim.AndIwanttorememberherlikethis:tellingafunnystory,fightingwithhercrazymom,beingcheeredonbypunkers,risingtotheoccasion,findinglittlepocketsofstrengthinherselfthatshehadnoideashepossessed.

           Adamisadifferentstory.RememberingAdamwouldbelikelosinghimalloveragain,andI’mnotsureifIcanbearthatontopofeverythingelse.

           Kim’suptothepartofOperationDistraction,whenBrookeVegaandadozenassortedpunksdescendeduponthehospital.ShetellsmethatbeforetheygottotheICU,shewassoscaredofgettingintotrouble,buthowwhensheburstinsidetheward,she’dfeltexhilarated.Whentheguardhadgrabbedher,shehadn’tbeenscaredatall."Ikeptthinking,what’stheworstthatcouldhappen?Igotojail.Momhasaconniption.Igetgroundedforayear."Shestopsforaminute."Butafterwhat’shappenedtoday,thatwouldbenothing.