Над пропастью во ржи

           AllthatcraptheyhaveincartoonsintheSaturdayEveningPostandall,showingguysonstreetcornerslookingsoreashellbecausetheirdatesarelate—that’sbunk.Ifagirllooksswellwhenshemeetsyou,whogivesadamnifshe’slate?Nobody."Webetterhurry,"Isaid."Theshowstartsattwo-forty."Westartedgoingdownthestairstowherethetaxisare.

           "Whatarewegoingtosee?"shesaid.

           "Idon’tknow.TheLunts.It’sallIcouldgetticketsfor."

           "TheLunts!Oh,marvelous!"Itoldyoushe’dgomadwhenshehearditwasfortheLunts.

           Wehorsedaroundalittlebitinthecabonthewayovertothetheater.Atfirstshedidn’twantto,becauseshehadherlipstickonandall,butIwasbeingseductiveashellandshedidn’thaveanyalternative.Twice,whenthegoddamcabstoppedshortintraffic,Idamnnearfellofftheseat.Thosedamndriversneverevenlookwherethey’regoing,Isweartheydon’t.Then,justtoshowyouhowcrazyIam,whenwewerecomingoutofthisbigclinch,ItoldherIlovedherandall.Itwasalie,ofcourse,butthethingis,ImeantitwhenIsaidit.I’mcrazy.IsweartoGodIam.

           "Oh,darling,Iloveyoutoo,"shesaid.Then,rightinthesamedamnbreath,shesaid,"Promisemeyou’llletyourhairgrow.Crewcutsaregettingcorny.Andyourhair’ssolovely."

           Lovelymyass.

           Theshowwasn’tasbadassomeI’veseen.Itwasonthecrappyside,though.Itwasaboutfivehundredthousandyearsinthelifeofthisoneoldcouple.