Вино из одуванчиков

           Tomwatched,hypnotizedbythesmallbonfireofinsectsleapingandfurlingwithinthejar,untilhefroze,sleeping,raisedonelbow,whileDouglaswroteon.Hesummeditalluponafinalpage:

           YOUCAN’TDEPENDONTHINGSBECAUSE...

           ...likemachines,forinstance,theyfallapartorrustorrot,ormaybenevergetfinishedatall...orwindupingarages...

           ...liketennisshoes,youcanonlyrunsofar,sofast,andthentheearth’sgotyouagain...

           ...liketrolleys.Trolleys,bigastheyare,always

           cometotheendoftheline...

           YOUCAN’TDEPENDONPEOPLEBECAUSE...

           ...theygoaway...strangersdie...peopleyouknowfairlywelldie...friendsdie...peoplemurderpeople,likeinbooks...yourownfolkscandie.

           So...

           Heheldontoadoublefistfulofbreath,letithissoutslow,grabbedmorebreath,andletitwhisperthroughhistight-grittedteeth.

           SO.Hefinishedinhugeheavilyblockedcapitals.

           SOIFTROLLEYSANDRUNABOUTSANDFRIENDSANDNEARFRIENDSCANGOAWAYFORAWHILEORGOAWAYFOREVER,ORRUST,ORFALLAPARTORDIE,ANDIFPEOPLECANBEMURDERED,ANDIFSOMEONELIKEGREAT—

           GRANDMA,WHOWASGOINGTOLIVEFOREVER,CANDIE...IFALLOFTHISISTRUE...THEN...I,DOUGLASSPAULDING,SOMEDAY...MUST...

           Butthefireflies,asifextinguishedbyhissomberthoughts,hadsoftlyturnedthemselvesoff.

           Ican’twriteanymore,anyway,thoughtDouglas.Iwon’twriteanymore.Iwon’t,Iwon’tfinishittonight.

           HelookedoveratTomasleeponhisupraisedelbowandhand.