Мхи старой усадьбы
Mrs. Bullfrog
Coveringmyfacewithbothhands,Iemittedadeepanddeathlikegroan,asifmytormentedsoulwererendingmeasunder—I,themostexquisitelyfastidiousofmen,andwhosewifewastohavebeenthemostdelicateandrefinedofwomen,withallthefreshdew-dropsglitteringonhervirginrosebudofaheart!
Ithoughtoftheglossyringletsandpearlyteeth;IthoughtoftheKalydor;Ithoughtofthecoachman’sbruisedearandbloodynose;Ithoughtofthetenderlovesecretswhichshehadwhisperedtothejudgeandjuryandathousandtitteringauditors,—andgaveanothergroan!
"Mr.Bullfrog,"saidmywife.
AsImadenoreply,shegentlytookmyhandswithinherown,removedthemfrommyface,andfixedhereyessteadfastlyonmine.
"Mr.Bullfrog,"saidshe,notunkindly,yetwithallthedecisionofherstrongcharacter,"letmeadviseyoutoovercomethisfoolishweakness,andproveyourself,tothebestofyourability,asgoodahusbandasIwillbeawife.Youhavediscovered,perhaps,somelittleimperfectionsinyourbride.Well,whatdidyouexpect?Womenarenotangels.Iftheywere,theywouldgotoheavenforhusbands;or,atleast,bemoredifficultintheirchoiceonearth."
"Butwhyconcealthoseimperfections?"interposedI,tremulously.
"Now,mylove,arenotyouamostunreasonablelittleman?"saidMrs.Bullfrog,pattingmeonthecheek."Oughtawomantodiscloseherfrailtiesearlierthantheweddingday?Fewhusbands,Iassureyou,makethediscoveryinsuchgoodseason,andstillfewercomplainthatthesetriflesareconcealedtoolong.Well,whatastrangemanyouare!Poh!youarejoking