Дни грёз

           AsImusedthere,withthelow,grey,purposeful-lookingbuildingbeforeme,andthoughtofmypleasantfriendswithin,andwhatgoodtimestheyalwaysseemedtobehaving,andhowtheylarkedwiththeIrishterrier,whosefootingwasoneofaperfectequality,Ithoughtofacertainlookintheirfaces,asiftheyhadacommonpurposeandabusiness,andwereactingunderordersthoroughlyrecognisedandunderstood.Iremembered,too,somethingthatMarthahadtoldme,aboutthesesamefellowsdoing“apowero’good,”andotherhintsIhadcollectedvaguely,ofrenouncements,rules,self-denials,andthelike.Thereupon,outofthedepthsofmymorbidsoulswamupanewandfascinatingidea;andatoncethecareerofarmsseemedover-actedandstale,andpiracy,asaprofession,flatandunprofitable.This,then,orsomethinglikeit,shouldbemyvocationandmyrevenge.Asevererlineofbusiness,perhaps,suchasIhadreadof;somethingthatincludedblackbreadandahair-shirt.Thereshouldbevows,too—irrevocable,bloodcurdlingvows;andanirongrating.Thisirongratingwasthemostnecessaryfeatureofall,forIintendedthatontheothersideofitmyrelationsshouldrangethemselves—Imentallyranoverthecatalogue,andsawthatthewholegangwaspresent,allintheirproperplaces—asad-eyedrow,combinedintristfulappeal.“Weseeourerrornow,”theywouldsay;“wewerealwaysdulldogs,slowtocatch—especiallyinthoseakintous—thefinerqualitiesofsoul!Wemisunderstoodyou,misappreciatedyou,andweownuptoit.