Стража! Стража!

           YouhadtohandittothePatrician,headmittedgrudgingly.Ifyoudidn’t,hesentmentocomeandtakeitaway.

           Whenhe’dgoneLordVetinarirangthelittlebronzebellthatsummonedhissecretary.Theman’sname,despitehishandwriting,wasLupineWonse.Heappeared,penpoised.

           YoucouldsaythisaboutLupineWonse.Hewasneat.Healwaysgavetheimpressionofjustbeingcompleted.Evenhishairwassosmoothed-downandoileditlookedasthoughithadbeenpaintedon.

           "TheWatchappearstobehavingsomedifficultywiththeThieves’Guild,"saidthePatrician."VanPewhasbeeninhereclaimingthatamemberoftheWatcharrestedhim."

           "Whatfor,sir?"

           "Beingathief,apparently."

           "AmemberoftheWatch?"saidthesecretary.

           "Iknow.Butjustsortitout,willyou?"

           ThePatriciansmiledtohimself.

           ItwasalwayshardtofathomLordVetinari’sidiosyncraticsenseofhumour,butavisionofthered-faced,irateheadthiefkeptcomingbacktohim.

           OneofthePatrician’sgreatestcontributionstothereliableoperationofAnkh-Morporkhadbeen,veryearlyinhisadministration,thelegalisingoftheancientGuildofThieves.Crimewasalwayswithus,hereasoned,andtherefore,ifyouweregoingtohavecrime,itatleastshouldbeorganisedcrime.