Эпоха невинности
Chapter 18
Shegavehimbackallhiskiss,butafteramomenthefeltherstiffeninginhisarms,andsheputhimasideandstoodup."Ah,mypoorNewland—Isupposethishadtobe.Butitdoesn’tintheleastalterthings,"shesaid,lookingdownathiminherturnfromthehearth."Italtersthewholeoflifeforme.""No,no—itmustn’t,itcan’t.You’reengagedtoMayWelland;andI’mmarried."Hestooduptoo,flushedandresolute."Nonsense!It’stoolateforthatsortofthing.We’venorighttolietootherpeopleortoourselves.Wewon’ttalkofyourmarriage;butdoyouseememarryingMayafterthis?"Shestoodsilent,restingherthinelbowsonthemantelpiece,herprofilereflectedintheglassbehindher.Oneofthelocksofherchignonhadbecomeloosenedandhungonherneck;shelookedhaggardandalmostold."Idon’tseeyou,"shesaidatlength,"puttingthatquestiontoMay.Doyou?"Hegavearecklessshrug."It’stoolatetodoanythingelse.""Yousaythatbecauseit’stheeasiestthingtosayatthismoment—notbecauseit’strue.Inrealityit’stoolatetodoanythingbutwhatwe’dbothdecidedon.""Ah,Idon’tunderstandyou!"Sheforcedapitifulsmilethatpinchedherfaceinsteadofsmoothingit."Youdon’tunderstandbecauseyouhaven’tyetguessedhowyou’vechangedthingsforme:oh,fromthefirst—longbeforeIknewallyou’ddone.""AllI’ddone?""Yes.Iwasperfectlyunconsciousatfirstthatpeopleherewereshyofme—thattheythoughtIwasadreadfulsortofperson.Itseemstheyhadevenrefusedtomeetmeatdinner.